Friday, September 28, 2012

"You're not helping us find a home."
She said this in a cute, "hey wait a minute" tone as she put a spoon and some sherbet in her mouth.
She had looked over my shoulder at my computer screen in the disguise of a hug and found what she feared.  She had been on the apartment hunt alone which is why I wasn't bringing in a single kill.

I wasn't helping us find a home.  I was reading a new blog I recently discovered that is going to make me a better man.  I thought about telling her this, but we both knew it was a lie.  I smiled at her and asked her for some sherbet.  She is nice to me when I'm dumb, which is why I'm marrying her, so she smiled back and shared.

I just wanted to start the search tomorrow.  The productivity of September 26th had expired and I was willing to admit it.  But what if it wasn't quite used up?

What is the smallest step that I could take right now?  Tonight.  Look for one apartment.  Write one sentence for the blog.  Read one chapter.  Write one note.

I am setting a new rule for myself:
Break the day barrier.  Sleep puts a wall in front of the flow of conviction.  It makes it easier to settle.  So I will do just one thing tonight.  It will make the inspiration transfer to the morning.

Do all of my dreams start tomorrow?  I write about this often because I think about this often.  I think about this often because I fall for this often.

This tomorrow syndrome that we've heard about since first grade is also why I haven't worked on this blog for a while.  I'm trying to marry this girl...

...and wedding planning has made the "I'll blog later" excuse sit on the surface.
But not tonight.  Tonight I will begin.

One other thought:
You have to sacrifice free time to get to freedom.  I like feeling like I'm learning that.